Daddy Fashion, or something...

Orange

Pink

Red

Purple

Patchwork

Stripes

Dressy

Burmudas

Long Sleeves

&

Crazy Hair

It's a Daddy and Miss Sass colaborative! Wow... that's all I got, just wow.

Dress Up Your Dip!

Okay, I know I'm a nerd, but I'm still laughing about my name for this post. ;) This is just some ranch dressing with grated carrots and grape tomato garnishes. I also cracked some peppercorn medly on the top.

This took just seconds to do and the kids thought it was AH-some! Miss Sass was particularly excited to start eating her veggies. Definitely good news, since she is so set on just carrots and spinach, all other veggies be darned! ;)

On another note entirely... I've been yelling at the kids all week because they got water guns as a special prize at the dentist. Naturally, they keep trying to fill them up and shoot them in the house! Really, they have been in time out more times than I can count and I took the guns away for two days.

So the hubster was home today and they were all running around screaming, slamming doors, and being their typical crazy! Miss Sass runs into my office with soaking wet hair. Oh no, they didn't! Just then, the entire crowd falls into the room in one big heap with Daddy on top, holding two water pistols and shooting at everyone. Yep, he did! Geesh, a girl just can't win around here!

My husband can break anything!

No really, I mean that... especially if his brother is involved. So there's this company, Coleman, that made these virtually "indestructable" canoes. What they mean by that is the hull. Yeah, no one ever figures on the frame breaking... twice. Shall I go on or just tell the story? Ok, the story then. I was not there, but I'll do my best...

Daniel (the hubby), Steven (Bro-in-law), and Randy (Dad-in-law) decide to canoe the Arkansas River the day after a two day storm. --1st Mistake-- Typically, you would want two people to a canoe. Steven's brother-in-law was going to join them, but had to cancel last minute. So they decided to all hop in one canoe together! --2nd Mistake, yeah we're already at mistake #2, so you get the idea-- Apparently most of the trip was just fun and games until they hit a rather rough patch. Randy takes a tree branch to the chest that throws him from the canoe. Daniel jumps out to keep the canoe from capsizing, and Steven (the smallest by a considerable amount) simply could not keep the 17 foot canoe going from the middle seat in the swift current. By the end, the canoe's keel and one thwart (both parts of the frame) had snapped and all three of the guys went for more than one nice swim down a not-so-calm river of 5 foot rapids. At one point, Daniel was pinned against a tree... by the canoe. Then it was Steven's turn as he was the only one who had a hand on their only way home and his other hand clung desparately to a tree. Everytime he managed to pull the canoe closer, his head went under. Not exactly conducive to survival. When they finally managed to get out of the river, 500 yards downstream from their vehicle, they found the only way back was to carry the canoe through 5 football fields worth of thorny bushes. With no shoes. In addition to the scrapes, bruises, severe sunburns and previously described property damage, there were also several items lost. They include:

A brand new cooler (with lunch, 4 beers, 1 Dt Dr. Pepper & 2 Dr. Peppers)
Two seat backs ........... So, have I mentioned yet that they borrowed the canoe!?!?!
Bladder control (to which the guys have not admitted, I'm just guessing on that one)
2 Shirts
2 stabilizers
2 oars
1 pair of sunglasses
1 pair of suspenders, no, really my father-in-law loves 'em

As my husband told this harrowing tale of bravery and cunning on the trecherous waters of the Arkansas to our children, they stared at him with awed looks of terror and pride. The oldest and most inquisitive asked for a recitation of every tiny detail and a description of the damages inflicted on the canoe he has taken oh-so-many rides in. The middle child and most dramatic/creative simply asked in a gasp, "You mean, you almost died!?!" (eh, he's in Kindergarten... everyone almost dies, all the time.) But the youngest, our only girl and the princess of the house held her hands over her mouth for a long moment. When she was finally able to speak, it was in hushed tones of agony "You lost your shoe?"

Funny story... to everyone else.

I guess I can see the humor in it, but I wish there were nothing to laugh at. Last night when I started dinner, Dan yelled from the other room, "is somebody burning something?" Sadly, this is a true story. Even more pathetic, I didn't have to answer. Joshua pops up, "No Daddy, Mommy's just cooking!" So embarassing... My four year old son has to eat what I burn everyday, poor kid. But, today was better. I made lunch, completely on my own. There was no burning, not even a burning-type smell. AND, my family all liked it! It was amazing! Typically the only time I don't burn or otherwise destroy our meals is when I make sandwiches, and that isn't a joke. I keep thinking I'll get better at this whole wife, mother, patron saint of cleaning thing, but it doesn't seem to hold... On a higher note, our dishwasher is functioning again. For a while Dan refused to fix it, claiming that the one we were currently using was in perfect working order. For those who are not used to Dan, or maybe are not as quick with the inappropriate female bashing, he was referring to me as the dishwasher. I know, men are, well, you know.